The New York Yankees advance past the Cleveland Guardians to the darkest possible timeline for the American League, and we choose to stan the Philadelphia Phillies, which is most likely the kiss of death for their playoff chances.


Derek Montilla, occasionally known as The Mayor of PHNX, has covered the Arizona Diamondbacks beat for over 10 seasons. He's a career .093 hitter as an amateur with more errors than runs scored, so everyone decided that the press box was a better fit. The Arizona native is a diehard fan of all Valley sports and can also be found roaming free ringside at local pro wrestling shows.